It's All About Perspective

Yesterday I left work late....again. Things have been stressful at work these last few weeks which has left me no choice but to come in early and leave late. As I walked to my car I was kind of grumbling to myself about how I hate that I never actually get to leave at 5:00 like I'm supposed to until I stopped and was reminded of just how blessed I am just to have a job. It seems like every day I'm hearing on the news about more jobs being lost and here I am feeling frustrated because I think I'm working too much!

A I thought of all of this as I was driving home I was reminded of all the complaints that have been in my mind these last few weeks that really are so ridiculous and then I promptly had a good laugh at myself. Really, I am so blessed and have no right or reason to complain at all.

I made a mental list of all my "complaints" and with every single one of them was able to come up with a reason why things weren't as bad as they seemed after all.

I've been complaining that Steve is still a temp and hasn't got hired on as a full time employee at the company he's been working at, when the reality is that he's not only been promoted but the company is spending money investing in him. They've already paid for him to spend a week in Chicago next month for further training. Yes, he doesn't have the security of knowing he's their "permanent employee" yet, but he has had steady work since April and it's probably only a matter of time before they hire him on for real.

I've been bummed out because right now we don't have health insurance, but haven't stopped to think about how we are so blessed that had we been insured we wouldn't have had to use the insurance anyway. We're so healthy that neither one of us has had a reason to go the doctor in nearly a year.

I've been complaining because I miss my friends back home, but in reality I've been able to see at least one of my friends from St. Louis on almost a weekly basis for the past few months through either them visiting us here or us taking a trip home.

I've been complaining because it just seems like we don't make enough money to do anything we want to or save for our future, but in reality we are so blessed to be able to pay all of the bills and with the exception of our mortgage have absolutely no debt at all.

When I really sit back and think about all my "complaints" I can't help but just feel really blessed. Really, nothing in life will ever be just how I like it, but when I really stop at look at all my complaints vs. my blessings I can't help but feel so blessed and taken care of by God.

Now, the really hard part is just reminding myself to stop and think about the many blessings in my life rather then get down about the things I have no control over.

Camping Fun!

We had a great weekend in the great outdoors! Friday after work we headed up to Devil's Lake State Park to meet up with everyone for a weekend of camping. I love camping, but unfortunately don't get to go very often, so I've been really looking forward to this weekend.

Not the best picture of us, but what can I say, we were hiking!
Saturday morning we woke up to Pat cooking a gigantic breakfast of french toast and sausages and then we headed off for a beautiful hike. We hiked up to Balanced Rock - a very steep hike, but very well worth it for the gorgeous views from the top of the mountain. We opted to take the longer route back down and headed to the East Bluff trail - it was such a beautiful hike and a nice trail. We stopped a few times to check out some of the cool rock formations (yes, I am that geek that gets a kick out of looking at rock formations) and plants.It was neat having Jarod (aka "Mr. DNR") with us to educate us on all the different plants and conservation efforts going on in the area. I love that he has such a passion for what he does.

The guys stopping to see how high up we were
After we made it back to our campsite we were pooped and spent the rest of the day hanging out. We took a little snooze in the hammock and then played a little volleyball before dinner.
Chris, Christina and Nich and Sarah came up to join us for the evening and we spent another night sitting around the campfire, having fun, chatting it up and eating Smores!

Sunday morning we had an extra special surprise, we were just getting ready to sit down to yet another huge breakfast (of course made by Pat) when a mini-van pulled into our campsite and a lady got out yelling something about wanting a free breakfast. I was shocked when I looked up and saw Alma! Apparently she had been talking to Julie for weeks and had planned to surprise us. It was so good to see her, Brad and the kids. We hung out with them for the afternoon and then parted ways. They're going to vacation in Wisconsin Dells for a few days and will come back and stay with us toward the end of the week for a few days.
I just love having friends from St. Louis come visit us...even more then I love going back home to visit them!
It was a fun weekend and so good to get away. I can't say that I was able to completely forget about all the things that I needed to be taking care of around the house or the stresses of some of the stuff going on at work, but it was kind of nice to be forced to get away from it all.
Next weekend we'll actually be in town for the first weekend in what feels like forever. I'm really looking forward to waking up in my own bed on Saturday morning and enjoying my morning coffee.

New Life and a Mother's Love

Last night I went out to dinner with Sarah and afterwards we stopped by Ben & Katie's to see their new little bundle of joy. Phin was born on Tuesday and is so cute! There is nothing like looking at a newborn peacefully sleeping in its brand new environment. I just can't imagine what it must be like to be a parent and watch this little human that you created grow up and experience life. It really got me thinking as I was listening to Katie describe how even after her exhausting labor all she wanted to do was love on and take care of her new little boy rather than rest.

The other night I was over at Chris & Christina's and loved watching the interaction between Christina and Liliana when Chris brought Liliana home from her toddler swim classes. Not only was Liliana's joy evident after seeing her momma again after just a few hours, but Christina lit up when she saw her little girl. I have always loved the way that Christina is passionate about living life to the fullest, but nothing has compared to watching her this last year since they've adopted Liliana and she's become a mommy. Life has changed in a drastic way and I love to see the love that she has for her daughter.

Watching her has made me so thankful for my own mom, and as I get older I find that I'm always finding new things that I appreciate about my mom. I remember the summer after I graduated from high school I'd often find my mom sitting in our living room, kleenex box in hand, crying because she couldn't believe that I was all grown up and moving to the other side of the country to leave her alone. At the time I made fun of her and was completely embarrassed about the way she couldn't hide her love for me, but now, even though I have no children and still can't really relate to her, I can only imagine how hard that must have been to send "her baby" out into a giant world and just hope and pray that she's instilled enough of the "good stuff" in me so that I would make it.

Letting us kids go once we were ready was probably the most difficult task that my mother had in the 18 years that she had spent raising us, even in spite of being abandoned by my father to raise two kids on her own. She did a pretty good job and both Andy and I turned out all right, but I know that part of my mom still wants to be the mom who fixes all of our problems and makes everything better and that will probably never change.
I couldn't help but laugh last weekend as Steve & I left Minneapolis and said good-bye to my stepmother who was balling like a baby because we were leaving her. My mom does the same thing every time that we come home for a visit and she has to take us back to the airport. I know that some things will never change and rather than be annoyed by it I really want to choose to appreciate that I am so loved by both of the woman in my life that have watched me grow up.

I only hope and pray that when the day comes for Steve and I to have kids that our kids will always know how much they are loved by us the way that I always knew I was loved by my mom when I was growing up.

Weekend In Minnesota

We had a nice weekend up in Minneapolis for Brian and Katie's wedding. It was a quick trip, but kind of nice to get away nonetheless. They had a very unique wedding in the backyard of their lakehouse. I loved that it was casual enough that I didn't have to get all dressed up. Brian & Katie had their dog Barney for a ring bearer. It was kind of cute, Barney didn't leave Katie's side all day long.

After the wedding a pirate ship showed up to give people trips around the lake - such a fun idea! They also had boats and wake boarding, but unfortunately it was too cold of a day to swim in the lake anyway (which was fine by me!).

It was good to catch up with family that I haven't seen in awhile and just sit back and not do a whole lot for a few hours. Steve and I were both exhausted from a busy last few days before the wedding, so unfortunately we weren't the most exciting folks to be around.
Me with Bonnie (my stepmother).
Sunday we slept in (yes, it's sad that 8:00 am is "sleeping in" to us) and then headed to downtown Minneapolis to hang out for awhile before we met up with more family for lunch. This was the first time that we've driven to Minneapolis since we move to Madison and it was actually a pretty quick and painless drive, so I'm sure we'll be going again in the future to do some more exploring of the city. Next weekend we're off to Devil's Lake to go camping for the weekend!

Flat Tire on a Friday morning...

I got up early to run a few errands before work and ended up with a flat tire while I was out. I don't get what the deal is, between Steve and I we've had 3 flat tires in the last 3 weeks.

What's ironic is that I was feeling pretty bummed out this morning and for some ridiculous reason I couldn't help but laugh at my car troubles.

Steve and I talked last night and we're both kind of in a place of wondering what we're doing here. We know that Madison is where were supposed to be and we really like it here, but so many times we just feel kind of useless and can't help but wonder why we're here. I think what's the hardest is that we both just feel kind of lonely. We miss having close friends in our lives that we know love us - the type of friends that we know we could call in the middle of the night if we needed to and they would be there for us. We have made quite a few friends here, but not friends like that. We miss having those kind of friends in our lives.
For some reason it's especially hard for me to know that Steve is feeling the same way that I do. I hate knowing that the person I love the most is feeling kinda lonely and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm so glad that we have each other, but I also know that we both need others in our lives as well. It leaves me feeling kind of helpless and I wish there was something I could do to make this season of life easier on Steve.

In the meantime all I can do is keep my chin up and remind myself of all the blessings in my life. Despite feeling a little bummed I know that I really do have a good life.

This weekend we're off to Minneapolis for yet another wedding. I will be so happy once August 8th comes and we're done with our summer wedding tour!

Weekend Update

We had another busy but good weekend. Friday night we had Michael & Alice over for a Mexican feast and we were all so stuffed. My husband sure can cook though!

Jess came to visit from St. Louis this weekend and it was so fun to hang out with her and reconnect with her again. I'm so proud of the wonderful woman she's become despite hard circumstances in life and things she's had to deal with at a young age. She's 9 years younger than me and I remember back when I first moved to St. Louis and started working with the youth group at church she was just 14 and trying to figure out who she was. Now it's hard to believe that in just a few months she'll be graduating from college. I'm so excited to see what the future holds for her!

Saturday afternoon we headed up to Milwaukee for Nich & Sarah's wedding extravaganza. The weather was great, so it was a perfect day to sit outside and hang out with friends. Saturday night we took Jess out for a night on the town in Madison and then met up with some friends down at the Union.

Sunday came and it was the first public service for our little Madison Vineyard church! How exciting! The service went better than expected. We all had a little picnic in the park for lunch afterwards and then Steve had a hurling game in the afternoon.


It was such a busy weekend and left me so exhausted that I was almost (notice I said *almost*) excited for Monday to get here. I'm started to feel a little burnt out from being so busy over the last few weeks. I keep telling myself that if I can just make it to mid-August I'll be fine. This weekend we're off to Minneapolis for yet another wedding.

The 5 Love Languges

Last night Steve got another flat tire on the way home from hurling practice (this is the second flat tire he's got in the last 2 weeks). Luckily he was able to air it up enough to make it home. Once he got home he went outside to change it and our sweet neighbor came out insistent that she call AAA and have them come change it.

Steve is not only completely capable of changing the tire on his own, but if we wanted to we could have called AAA ourselves, as we also are members. It was so sweet and cute how our neighbor really wanted us to use the service that "she pays for but never uses" and after her suggesting it more than 5 times Steve finally gave in and figured it was important to her that we let her help us out, even though we didn't really need it. It was so sweet and thoughtful, but made me sad for her. Her elderly father passed away last month and I think she wanted to feel needed by someone because she used to help him out so much.

It was just a good reminder to me that sometimes people need to feel needed and that's okay. Most of the time when others sacrifice for me it makes me feel bad, but it's because I'm forgetting that by allowing them to love on us we're making them feel loved, appreciated and needed. So many times I forget that not everyone is like me and feels love the same way I do. One of the most useful books I have ever read is The Five Love Languages. It was actually written for couples, and has not only enriched my marriage, but actually has also enriched my relationships with all of the people that I love. It's basically all about finding out how others like to give and receive love and then speaking their "love language" in your relationship - whether it be by encouraging words, quality time spent together, acts of service, physical touch or by giving (or receiving) a gift.

Anyway, all of this got me thinking and just makes me want to be more aware of how others give and receive love, so that I can allow them to be who they are rather than just ignorantly think that everyone speaks the same "love language" that I do. So many times it's easy to forget that just because we think and act a certain way doesn't mean that everyone else thinks and acts that same way. It's good to be reminded from time to time that's it's not all about me, but more about me being aware of others. Sometimes I can be really selfish and forget that, but I really want to change that in me. I have a feeling that one's going to be a life-long learning curve though. :)

To Do....or Not To Do

I am a very detailed person - to the point of annoyance with most people. Lately I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with balancing the demands of work, home, church and friends. Most of these things (with the exception of work) I guess I can't really categorize as a "demand" but they all take up time - sometimes it's time that I enjoy and sometime not, so nonetheless "demands" is the name they get.

I've found lately though that I've turned into quite the list person, because really it's the only way I've been able to get things done. I have so much on my plate right now that the things that used to be part of my second nature (like pay the mortgage on the 25th of every month) are things that I'm having a hard time remembering because there's so much stuff crowded into my mind. Thus, I've turned into a "To Do" list girl.

I've had to resort to these darn lists because I haven't been sleeping well at night. I just lay awake thinking of of all the things I'm afraid that I'm going to forget to do. It's helped a lot to write things down as I think of them so I don't have to worry so much.

I have 4 basic lists that I'm working on every day:

Work list - (self explanatory)

Home list - (bills, projects around the house, cleaning & organizing, grocery shopping, laundry)

Church list - (typing up power points, working on worship sets/learning new music, buying and organizing supplies, making sure upcoming events are in my calendar, updating our church facebook page, researching products we can use, making sure I'm spending time with people that have come into our church (also part of the "friend list").

Friend List - - scheduling time with friends, buying gifts (for all the weddings we seem to never stop going to), keeping up with out of town friends (thank God for Facebook which makes that part a lot easier!) and continuing to keep in touch with new friends that we've made here.

Can you tell that I'm sick of lists? Seriously, after I compile all four of my lists I then have to update everything into my palm pilot just in case I have a few minutes of down time at work and can take care of a few items on my other lists.
The one bonus with all the lists is the sense of accomplishment I feel when I can cross something off the list....it literally is like a breath of fresh air.
I used to think that I was a person that is good at multi-tasking and handling stress, but here lately I've had my doubts as I've tried to keep up with everything.

Another thing that's really bothered me is that I've had to resort to "lists" to keep in touch with friends - it's seems so impersonal and insincere, which is totally not my heart. Really, I shouldn't have to have an item marked as a "to do" in order to call my mom, but I know that if I don't write it down it probably won't happen (I know because I haven't actually called my mom since mother's day).

So, regardless of how it makes me feel, I'm resorting to the lists to help run my life. Hopefully it's just for a season and things will slow down and my mind will get back with the program. I don't want to become a list nazi, but I do want to learn to become a more balanced person in all areas of my life that is able to find time to get everything done that I need to. I sure have been asking God for a lot of grace lately!

Encouraged and Excited....

Hanging out with the guys at Dexter's on the 4th.
We had a great weekend with the guys here, but I am so worn out. The last 2 weeks have been crazy and I'm ready for some down time, which at this point it's looking I'm not going to get for another few weeks yet.

Yesterday was an exciting day. I went and bought a coffee machine for our church. After I got home I pulled out the new bean grinder that I had also purchased for the church last week and made myself a cup of coffee with our new equipment. I know it may seem silly, but it was so exciting for me to actually be putting together church supplies because it means we're growing! We've gone from just 6 of us meeting in our living room on Monday nights to buying church coffee supplies to welcome people to our first public (as in not meeting in a home) service next Sunday.
This has been such a crazy journey, but it's good to look back on each step we've taken along the way and see how God has put all of the details together. Last year at this time a church coffee machine was the last thing on our mind. We were still back in St. Louis packing up our belongings, waiting to sell our house and move up into the unknown. Now we have a new house and life here in Madison and are actually holding Sunday morning church services. How cool is that??

It is just so encouraging for me to look back on all that we've gone through in the last year and know that it wasn't all for nothing. I know that we still have a long ways to go, but I'm fine with trusting in the process and enjoying (or trying to) the ride - bumps along the road and all. God truly has been so good to us!

Happy 4th!!!!

We realized this morning that we didn't have a stand to put our flag in, so we had to make due with what we had. Yes, between our hideous front door and tacky flag set up we are the eye-sores of the neighborhood. At least nobody can say we're not patriotic though!
We had a good day yesterday - walking around downtown with a visit to the veterans museum, frisbee in the park, BBQ and music and beer at the Union. We all got a bit of sun and are exhausted today. I think we're gonna hit up Capitol Brewery this evening after BBQing at Chris & Tina's.
No, the guys are not all confused, the sun was just really bright, hence the squinting

Yesterday we went to one the parks on the shore of Lake Mendota and met an old man named Al who immediately made it his goal to give the guys frisbee throwing lessons complete with techniques on catching the frisbee behind their backs. It was pretty hilarious to watch. The guys finally got bored with the lessons and decided to play some "Frisbee 500" and it got a little brutal - no black eyes though. There definitely was a clear winner though - check out the air my hubby was getting!

Happy 3rd of July....

The guys got in late last night. I just love having friends here....except for the part about the toilet seat being left up . Steve's always puts it down, so I'm not used to it being up and almost had a mishap when I walked into the bathroom half-asleep this morning.

Besides a BBQ with friends at the park tonight we don't have a lot planned for the day, but I'm sure it won't take long to figure out something fun to do.
The guys are out playing frisbee golf right now and I just finished doing a Biggest Loser Cardio Max workout and let me tell you it kicked my butt! The day really couldn't be more perfect. I went on an early morning walk this morning and the weather is just beautiful....not too hot and not too cold, just how I like it!

It's my momma's birthday today!!! Yea! Wish we could celebrate with her.

That's all for now....Happy Friday!