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I woke up this morning just feeling blah. It's kind of one of those morning where I just don't want to face the day. In fact, I'm still just laying here in bed.
I just feel tired - not physically but emotionally. I feel that my emotions have been so unstable these last few weeks. One minute I'm choosing to be positive and believe that the glass really is half full and then the next minute something blows me over and I just don't know if I'll ever see that light at the end of the tunnel. It's so exhausting making the daily choice to believe good things and sometimes I feel like my mind is a constant battlefield.
In my heart though I know the reality - that God is with me and really everything is going to be allright, it's just continually choosing to walk in that that gets hard. Sometimes it's just so much easier to let discouragement set in and wallow in self pity.
So here I am, afraid to get out of bed knowing that once my feet touch the ground I don't really know what's in store for me in this day, and I'm trying to be okay with that. I know that half the battle is perspective and I'm just not quite sure I have enough of that today. I know that the choice is mine though. If I choose to make it a crappy day then no matter what happens it will be crappy. On the other hand if I choose to believe good things the day might still be crappy, but at least then I won't be a bummer to be around and that also will allow the opportunity for good things to happen rather than for me to just wallow in myself and feel like I'll never get a break like I allow myself to feel on so many other days. Really I'm realizing that daily the choice is mine and I'm disappointed that so many times I take the easy way out.
I think I'm going to take the high road and choose to believe in the good. God really is for me and I know that if I let him He can make something beautiful out of this day. So here goes....
I just feel tired - not physically but emotionally. I feel that my emotions have been so unstable these last few weeks. One minute I'm choosing to be positive and believe that the glass really is half full and then the next minute something blows me over and I just don't know if I'll ever see that light at the end of the tunnel. It's so exhausting making the daily choice to believe good things and sometimes I feel like my mind is a constant battlefield.
In my heart though I know the reality - that God is with me and really everything is going to be allright, it's just continually choosing to walk in that that gets hard. Sometimes it's just so much easier to let discouragement set in and wallow in self pity.
So here I am, afraid to get out of bed knowing that once my feet touch the ground I don't really know what's in store for me in this day, and I'm trying to be okay with that. I know that half the battle is perspective and I'm just not quite sure I have enough of that today. I know that the choice is mine though. If I choose to make it a crappy day then no matter what happens it will be crappy. On the other hand if I choose to believe good things the day might still be crappy, but at least then I won't be a bummer to be around and that also will allow the opportunity for good things to happen rather than for me to just wallow in myself and feel like I'll never get a break like I allow myself to feel on so many other days. Really I'm realizing that daily the choice is mine and I'm disappointed that so many times I take the easy way out.
I think I'm going to take the high road and choose to believe in the good. God really is for me and I know that if I let him He can make something beautiful out of this day. So here goes....
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